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cig moochers

Recently I've been doing very well cutting down the smoking. At my heaviest (which was in 2007) I was smoking almost 2 packs a day. Nasty. Now I'm almost at half-a-pack a day. I'm slowly making progress and my decision to wean myself off smoking instead of going cold turkey is working well.

I bought a dirt cheap brand of cigarettes a while ago just to try something different. I hated them - but I kept the pack, and only for one reason. It's for this neighbor of mine that every time he sees me says, "Hey, got a cigarette?"

Let me tell you about this pack I keep just for this guy.

First, the pack is at least 5 to 6 months old if not older. Heck, it might be a year old at this point.

Second, the filters are slightly yellowed with age.

Third, the tobacco in them is so nasty it crunches if you squeeze the cigarette. Smokers know that makes for one really nasty smoke and is the equivalent to smoking a shag carpet.

Fourth, I keep this pack in my laundry room next to the dryer, so I'm pretty sure these smokes are full of dryer lint.

Every time this mooch asks me for one, I say, "Hang on, I'll go inside and get one." I do, and give him one of these nasty smokes. Sometimes it hard for me to keep a straight face when I give him the cig because I know how awful they are, and know he's going to smoke it.

Sure enough, I saw the guy today. And like clockwork, he asked, "Got a cigarette?"

I sure do and was happy to let you have it. Enjoy your smoke, mooch.

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