must've wanted a slurpee *really* bad

At the intersection of Busch Boulevard and 50th Street in Tampa where the 7-Eleven is, some dude in a PT Cruiser (oddly enough) got plowed. The whole front end was mangled, bent driver's side tire.. I mean, it was ka-blammo, dead car. Driver most likely survived because the windshield (or windscreen for you English folk) was miraculously not cracked or blown out.

The two auto accidents that stand out in my mind most vividly were on the Mass Pike and at the old K-Mart shopping plaza in Putnam Connecticut.

The Mass Pike one was like something right out the television show COPS. Five lanes of traffic. Some dumb broad decides to pull a "power move" in her Mercury Sable. Cuts a lane, passenger side rear clips the driver's side front of the car in the next lane to her. This is all happening at 70mph by the way. She swerves left, right, left, right, left, right, front end of the car goes airborne, crashes down, flies across all lanes to the right, cheats death by not hitting anyone, then cheats death again by not hitting a steel guard rail and landing the car in a ditch.

I was about ten cars back and watched all of it happen. I pulled over, ran out of my car and helped her out. She was lucky to be alive.

The K-Mart plaza was nothing short of the funniest accident I've ever seen in my life - and to date nothing has topped it. It happened about fifteen or so years ago but I've never forgotten it.

I have to show an illustration here so you can follow along.

For those that remember this lot, this was before the speed bumps were put in on the store-side. It was stupid crap like what you're about to read that caused the bumps to be installed in the first place.

I'm putting along (see the green block) going towards the exit. I see this guy in a Ford Escort humming along at 15mph - too fast for a parking lot. Then out of the corner of my eye I see a Chevette barreling down the store-side of the curb at about 25mph - way too fast for a filled parking lot.

Neither guy sees each other. I slowed down and wondered.. Will they hit? And sure enough they did. WHAM! Both drivers were teenage kids. Neither one was hurt, but the look on the face of the guy driving the Chevette was PRICELESS. He was just in SHOCK.

I laughed my ass off, not only because the guy hit the other guy, but because a crappy Chevette plowed into a crappy Escort.

Ah, memories. 🙂