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WildBlue sucks

WildBlue sucks. Repeat, they suck.

I have had almost three days of spotty to absolutely no connectivity to the internet whatsoever and it's a miracle I'm even connected now. The average ping reply I'm getting to any site is around 2500ms when it should be 700ms or less.

I finally got fed up and decided to call WildBlue.

Call #1:

Spoke to a rep. I thought I was on beam 19 but I'm actually on beam 29 which is called "Laredo" (they name their beams, don't ask me why) which he fully admitted was having problems over the past week. Yeah, nice of WildBlue to alert its customers - WHICH THEY DIDN'T.

We go through standard help desk procedure crap. I shut them up quick concerning software-related problems when I tell them my Linux box can't connect because they don't know the first thing about Linux.

Rep tells me to unplug my modem, wait 30 minutes for a new IP and power it up again.

Fine. Whatever.

Rep also tells me that yes, it IS WildBlue's fault Beam 29 is having issues - not mine.

Call #2:

I plug the modem back in. It doesn't get a lock until an hour later (it's supposed to take less than two minutes). I call back.

Rep #2 says yes, Laredo is having problems and that they should be resolved within an hour or so.

Fine. Whatever.

He says the same thing the other guy says. Unplug modem, wait, plug back in.

Call #3:

I plugged the modem back in, it took over an hour to get a lock on the signal and - you guessed it - same problem. Dog slow. 2500ms ping replies to anywhere or they would time out completely - even to the gateway itself.

Yet another rep who is very intimidated by me and doesn't have the first clue how tech support works. I can tell he's very nervous, which he has right to be because I'm not a happy guy at this point.

Rep asks me who manufactured my coaxial cable (WHAT?!?!) I didn't know. I told him that the people who installed the dish and the cable were supposed to do a good job and use industry standard materials.

He tells me "Your cable is 2.25GHz and WildBlue requires 2.5GHz cable."

You have gotta be kidding me.

Yeah. The guy is grasping for straws at this point.

I tell him that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, which it doesn't. How is it that the 'net worked all this time and now all of a sudden it's magically the coax cable's fault? I made damn sure to tell him that if ANY new hardware is installed it will absolutely not be on my dime. No way. No how.

I deal with about 30 seconds of silence after that. He then tells me I'll have to be put on hold so he can see what he can do.

Fine. Whatever.

Rep comes off hold after about five minutes. He says he's going to have a technician call me to schedule a time to inspect the hardware, as in the dish and the cable - which will take 24 to 48 hours.

I'll tell you exactly how this will pan out:

Tomorrow is Sunday, so it's not going to be 24 to 48 hours. More like 48 to 96 hours.

Then when the tech calls, he won't be able to get to my house to inspect the hardware until the end of the week, or even next week.

I swear to God... if I knew what tools and whatever else I needed I would hop on the roof right now and do the work myself. At least then I would know it would be DONE RIGHT.

Tip to the masses: Do NOT use WildBlue. Don't go anywhere near them. Stay with cable or DSL. Can't get it? Stay with dial-up. Seriously. You'll be saving yourselves a whole boatload of headaches.

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