how to prepare for when the toilet does not work

Recently, there was some plumbing work that needed to be done where I live, and it required me to not use the water at all. I had to go without showering for a few days.

That was something I could deal with, since it's easy enough to wash with a wet cloth.

But what really bothered me was...

...I couldn't use the toilet.

This was one of those plumbing situations where running water or draining it into the pipes was an absolute no-go. If it were a situation where I couldn't run the water but could drain it, no problem, just fill the toilet tank manually, get one flush from that, then refill manually again for the next flush. That was not an option.

For the first time in my life, I had to acquire one of these:

The nice name for this is portable toilet or camping toilet.

But let's be real here. This is a shitbucket.

Did I actually have to use this thing? Fortunately, no. The plumbers got here, did the work and got the toilet (as well as other things) working again with the plumbing.

However, I was ready to use this thing if I had to.

The 101 on using a portable toilet in the house

In basic form - which is what you're seeing above, one of these toilets is just a 5 gallon bucket with a plastic toilet seat fitted to it. In fact, you can just outright buy the lid alone and use whatever 5 gallon bucket you want. The one I acquired came with both the bucket and lid.

What you need to successfully use one of these is the bucket itself, a kitchen trash bag to line it with (with spares for obvious reasons), some toilet paper or wipes (yes those are Dude Wipes you see in the photo, they have a no-fragrance version which I appreciate), and a disinfectant spray like Lysol, preferably of the aerosol variety.

And there's one last thing needed. A place to take the bag once you're done with your business, as in outside into a trash bin or dumpster. That bag can't stay in the house.

Better to have this than not have it

Worst case scenario is that you wake up at 2am with an urge to "do a number 2". Two choices present themselves. Either get dressed, get in the car and find somewhere that's open 24 hours with a toilet, or sit on the bucket.

Better to just have a seat, do your business and get it over with.

Again, I didn't have to use this thing. But if I had to, I would have. Better to use the bucket instead of literally having to drive into town just to do a bodily function.

Published 2024 Oct 31