rich menga books search contact

***Secret FSR Fender guitars? Yes, they exist, and they're right here

Amazon links are affiliated. Learn more.

No, not the Faire

The Woodstock Fair is officially underway, not to be confused with King Richard's Faire (and no, I'm not the King). My Pop is there as he is every year manning the Amateur Radio booth.

Before there was Foxwoods, before there was Interstate 395, heck... even before there were cars, septic systems and regulated electricity, the Woodstock Fair was there.

I decided several years ago to stop going to the Fair. From a very early age I realized...

This sucks!!

Before I get into why it sucks, the reason I even went to the Fair with the family in the first place was because my sister used to be a competing English Saddle Seat horse rider - not to be confused with Western riders. You can tell the English riders from other classes because they wear suits. No jeans, no cowboy hats.

Small note about cowboy hats: If there is a mixed-class event with Western riders and English Saddle Seat riders and the judge was wearing a cowboy hat - the English riders would never take first prize - ever. Very biased. I saw it happen many times. It was very common to hear "Don't trust a judge in a cowboy hat" because you'd always lose if you were an English rider, guaranteed.

The Fair is the Cadillac of riding events around these parts. My sister had many grand prize horse riding ribbons to her credit, so every year I was lumped along into going.

I said the Fair sucks. Here's why:

1. The human car wash

Yes, it's disgusting as it sounds. Hordes of people all over the place drowning in sweat. No room to move so you're always bumping elbows. It's bad enough when you sweat. It's positively disgusting when you encounter other people's sweat.

2. It stinks

Everyone stinks (K-PAX, anyone?), and most places reek of sweat, fried onions, polish sausage, bad french fries, "doughboys", corn dogs and cow crap. Lovely.

3. Hay, hay, hay!

There's hay everywhere on the ground. In some places there's a little. In others there's a lot. Yes, I know the Fair is an agricultural event (said loosely) but sheesh... would it kill someone to sweep the ground every three hours or so?

4. Nothing is cheap

It used to be that shopping at the Fair was a good deal where you could get things for reasonable prices - not so any longer and hasn't been for some time. Every vendor is out there to rape you for every dollar you have. Common response from vendors: "Hey, gotta make a living." Yeah, you go do that - but not on my dime.

5. Technology is a joke

They have this building called the "Technology Building" at the Fair that they put in a few years ago. It sucks. It's always sucked. There's nothing in there worth looking at. All you see are crappy ISP's hocking their wares. Maybe if they had an arcade game or two it would be slightly interesting. No such luck.

6. Dirt

You want dirt? You've found the mother lode. Dirt is everywhere. Right around noon time there is a fog of dirt that hovers like a cloud of doom over the entire grounds until around dusk. The staff try (and fail) every year to keep the dust in the air to a minimum... but this is agriculture, and ya caint have agricull-chuh wid-out sum dirt, Martha!

7. LOUD

Whereever there's a place with more people than you can shake a stick at, you're gonna have some noise. Add to that all the vendors, some of which have LOUDSPEAKERS at their booths so you can hear them, and the noise is damn near deafening.

--

So we've got a dust-filled, hay-strewn, overpriced, ear splitting bucket of stink, sweat and crap, and it costs you five bucks to park.

Sounds great! Where do I sign up?

***Guitar deals & steals? Where? Right here. Price drops, B-stock and tons more.

STOP - Your roads are safe now

I witnessed a very wonderful and happy thing yesterday - school buses picking up kids to go to school. I was very happy to patiently wait behind the buses in my truck as they flashed their red beacons of warning... Hey, hold on there fella, I'm truckin' kids to school here. You go right ahead, Mr. School Bus. You do your thing. I will wait.

One word: HOORAY!

This means that during the hours of 7am and 3pm-ish, most teen drivers are OFF THE ROAD and are sitting at a school desk doing their studious (heh) thing, leaving me free to drive the streets without dealing with those bass-thumping, sticker'ized cars the idiot teens drive while talking on their cell phones, blowing stop signs and doing other dumb crap on the road.

Ah, I love September.

🔥 Popular Articles 🔥
No BOSS DS-1
The BOSS DS-1 is an awful guitar pedal
Yes, I think this pedal sucks...
Casio F-91W
Casio F-91W cheat sheet
A quick guide on how to set the time, date and a few other tips and tricks.
Adjusting truss rod on Fender electric bass
What is the right way to adjust a truss rod at the heel?
This is not that big of a deal once you know how to do it.
Gibson Marauder
Gibson's "Norlin era" electric guitars
Norlin era Gibsons are some of the worst guitars Gibson ever made. Find out why.
Fender 3250L Guitar Strings
Rich's recommended guitar strings for Squier Stratocasters
Guitar string recommendation for Squier and Fender Stratocaster guitars
Ibanez AR420
List of 24.75" scale length guitars and other shorter models
24.75" scale electric guitars and other models down to the 24.0" scale.
⭐ Recent Articles ⭐
Jackson JS11 Dinky
Jackson JS11 Dinky, the ultimate project guitar?
When it comes to ready-to-mod guitars, it doesn't get much better than this.
Gibson L6-S, a Norlin era beast from the 1970s
Oh, no... not another Norlin era Gibson.
1960 Fender Musicmaster
Fender Musicmaster might be the ultimate retirement guitar
It's real-deal Fender vintage, it's available, and there's one other rather nice advantage to owning one of these.
Gretsch G2655T Streamliner Brownstone Maple
The easiest Bigsby? Gretsch G2655T Streamliner
When you want a Bigsby vibrato on a genuinely well-built guitar for not a lot of money, you go Gretsch.
Epiphone Les Paul Standard 60s Bourbon Burst
Almost perfect, Epiphone Les Paul Standard '60s Bourbon Burst
There is a whole lot of wow to this Les Paul.
Squier 40th Anniversary Jazzmaster Gold Edition
Classic or tacky? Squier 40th Anniversary Jazzmaster Gold Edition
Is this a classic, or is it tacky? Let's talk about that.