tales of gaseous anomalies
I just had a "Red Hot" burrito (the frozen microwavable kind) and washed that down with a Monster LO-CARB soda, my current favorite drink. I absolutely love microwave burritos and eat them regularly. They're cheap, take under two minutes to make, and go down well. While it's true you get a bad case of the farts afterwards, it's totally worth it. The burritos I buy aren't really red hot. More like "slightly-under-medium-hot", and that's just fine.
The first time I discovered microwave burritos was at a convenience store somewhere in Connecticut. I was traveling with a friend in a '67 Mustang and we had to stop to get some grub. When we walked into the place, he made a bee-line for the burritos and slams one in the microwave.
"Are those any good?"
"Yeah, try one."
So I did. I've been hooked on 'em ever since. There's basically three kinds. Chicken (little farts), Beef (average farts) and Bean (drive with the windows rolled down). Each has a hot and non-hot variant.
On a completely unrelated note, ST:TNG is on G4 right now. The episode is "Phantasms". The only reason I know this is because my DirecTV guide tells you what episode it is. This is the one where Data has weird dreams, stabs Troi in the neck (cool) and causes a general fracas all over the ship. Worf also seems to hate Data's cat. It's all good.